my fairy tale bones



By the time you read this I'll have drank my cardamom tea {homemade with green pods, just tossed gingerly in...no recipe- I simply crack em and toss em} and will be navigating dark skies on an early June Sunday.  So you know, tomorrow is the full Strawberry moon and that means tonight I'm vision boarding.  Maybe it's that time for you, too? I've always been drawn to full moon work...it's all powerful.  I'm happy to share with you that I have tickets to my dear friend Cate's upcoming Summer Solstice mini-retreat.  Her home & garden {I'm convinced there is a magical vortex there} is perfect for this kind of women-only gathering- we'll be "putting our old story to bed". I love how she is incorporating earthy rituals with soul journalling & that it all is happening to coincide with a very auspicious cosmic time...the solstice. Space is very limited but if you live near me & wish to join us then just shoot me an email at gillian at the spa on king dot com.

today's skies resemble these

I've written about this before but I always dream vividly and lucidly during solstice time.  I think there is so much more to things than we know...and funny enough I always dream that way too whenever it rains.  I wish I had more insight on that.  I've travelled to places in sleep that have stayed with me since...like a real soul journey.  This puzzle of existence is really an interesting thing. 

Since it cooled off and I love to create anything especially delicious food than today calls for soup and I know it's going to involve lentils and Moroccan spice because one of my friends sent me a recipe that has got to be made.  Today! Soup will be on this afternoon.  Tonight as you know is more creation with dream boards {such manifesty goodness}, and I just ordered online tickets for this for a good friend & me to see soon and I'm super jazzed because I'm drawn to anything Grimm, {it's my gothic-gene I'm sure of it}- who else is going to see this?

Happy Sunday under grey skies...from me & my fairy tale bones,

Gillian

xo

Today's Morning Walk; Insights & Choices

"My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment."

~Oprah Winfrey

On  my way to work this morning I noticed so much green & scent & sound.  The just over six kilometers is a great way to begin your day {as inspired by my husband who walks everywhere}.

The things that escape you when you travel by car are innumerable.  Astounded is a word I'd use to describe the bounty of nature that is abundant within an urban landscape. I'm walking to work as much as possible from now on.

I'm sitting at my desk preparing for my day and I realize that so much is about choice. Since making conscious choices in my life lately I've never felt so elated, so buzzing with joy over the little things I'd failed to notice before. Simply by breathing & sleeping & giving things my full attention- I've awakened.  Choice is key.  I loved this quote from Oprah, about taking responsibility for your life.  It applies to many areas; the friends you choose, the activities you choose, the foods you choose to nourish your body, the ways you choose to spend your time. Actively and consciously choosing is the key to happiness. {I'm sure of it.}

So girls- blow the dust off that bitch myth & live heartily in your truth; go forth by choosing who, what, when, where & why.  You will be so happy you did. 

Today my Belgian Chocolate coffee is in my cup straight up- black as night.  It's delicious.  No more cream or milk for me. I'm cutting out (choosing) and making small changes daily.  Things are getting vibrant kids!

Much love & happy until the next post. 

xox

Gillian

Pure living.

“When a man gives his opinion, he’s a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she’s a bitch.”- Phyllis Diller
(true, sadly)

I am, (quite proudly) a bitch.

xo

staring out to sea {happily}

The sky
Is a suspended blue ocean.
The stars are the fish
That swim.

~hafiz

It dawns on me, now & then- that we are keepers of

cathedrals of knowing.

There is a silencing of the corners of my life in many ways:

Minimizing

Beautifying

Braving

Defining

&

Shining

It's miraculous- a gift has been handed to me. {gratitude.}

I'm awakened, open to possibility and replete with JOY because I have found a new road. 

One that is gravelly and dusty but also canopied with the greenest trees that over look and guide and so begins my journey.  I don't envy anyone else today.  I'm standing full on in my shoes (paddock boots, rather) and loving loving loving the sounds, the sights, and the senses (being a strange woman myself) of being fully immersed in my life.

Off to create bouquets of moss & contentment & fluidity....

xo

flowers & snakes & moss & trees

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds

long to play with your hair. 

~Kahlil Gibran

We picked handfuls of violets and took photos of trees while walking in the woods today.  A grass snake, half a meter long & just a baby- crossed our path and I tried to pick him up {but away he slithered.} My youngest wasn't happy about that, she doesn't dig me picking up anything other than her.

The forest floor was carpeted with violets & trilliums & moss and green creatures.  The brisk yet gentle wind hustled sweetly as it flowed and ebbed betwixt the newly sprouting trees and we drank in the silence of it all.  A tailless squirrel with an unbridled and talented enthusiasm for climbing amazed us with his grace; dextrous as if he had possessed all his required physical squirrelly attributes.  You see it didn't matter to him that the tail was missing- he went about his life with confidence and ease.  My kind of squirrel.

Today was ivy plants being bathed and misted, meals being grilled, the snap of clean sheets applied to beds.  This day held many a charm, between the tea & the children & the shared conversations with friends. {It's nice to be understood. By the people that matter. A nice person I know once said to me, "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." And by golly that is the truth.}

Lately I'm dreaming of saris {such as the colourful ones recycled into the pillow case up there that I picked up on my journey to Jordan} and jewel tones and my upcoming trip to Morocco! {so excited}.  I'm journalling and organizing and well, basically just focusing on the things that bring me pure JOY.

Going deeper- in terms of self-actualization- I'm becoming the person I've always dreamed of lately.  The one who really likes herself enough. Enough to not allow anything or anyone to try to get the better of her.  The one who loves all her fantastic ideas, the one who follows all her big dreams, and the one who is being and living in absolute truth.

I wish the same for you.  I really do. ;)

xo

the sun on my hands & collecting secret spaces

"What can you ever really know of other people's souls- of their temptations, their opportunities, their struggles? One soul in the whole creation you do know: and it is the only one whose fate is placed in your hands."

~C.S. Lewis

With a ten and two grip, driving home from the dog groomer's this morning I noticed how good the sun felt on my hands.  For a nano-second I considered moving to eight and four, to avoid the glare of the sun and it's aging effect that we all know can make 41 year old hands look 81.  But in that same flash a burst of insight; it felt far better with the sun on them, than it would to deprive them in order to preserve them. So at ten and two they stayed.

I took this photo of some old postcards featuring amazing hands that I had kicking around. I shot pics of a lot of things before I pitched them out. This way I still have something of them, allbeit in electron form. There is only so much room for the material.

I love hands. I'm not alone in that, some take to naming blogs after them and shooting artful pics of them.  They do so much {hands} and really are often overlooked.  Hands have soul. Mine do so much, who am I to pull them out of the sun?

I read about "collecting secret spaces" this week on Nat Geo Traveler. Author Daisann MacLane writes here, all about her travels also.  I love the idea of seeking out the untouristic niches of a city. Taking my own notes, mentally filing and cataloging them away until I'm able to share with someone else. Then when it's shared with another it's like opening the doorway to a new world and asking that person to step through the door and experience it too.  Travel has a magical way about it, when done right.  I'm sure you all have your secret spaces too, verdant with memories and rich with your awareness- these places are better for having known you.  Our footprint is pressed upon the world in so many ways.

Last, while I sip my coffee and dream a little dream...I'm thinking about how a capsule wardrobe introduced to me via Christine Mason Miller is calling my name.  For YEARS I've sought out one of these done right.  Age appropriate. Stylish. Could I wear this for life? It would give me time to focus on the important.

Christine blogged recently about {r} revolution apparel. They have revolutionized shopping for women like me; women who want to look gorgeous (yes I said gorgeous and yes it's important for the soul to feel gorgeous!) but not spend too much time thinking about it.  Think- ten items for ten days in Morocco this October. Yet- I'd create over 100 looks if I needed to.  It's sheer genius. I think I'll start by ordering one of these.  Can't wait for the rest of the collection to be unveiled.

Toodles!!

xo

Where things are at.

I'm clearing out to make room for the new.  It's a spring thing...I decided I have far too much crap in my house and I'm letting go of it to make room for new crap.  But first I'll love living in clean minimalism for a spell.  Do you find you do that too...keep things "just in case" you need them ?
Someone wonderful at clearing out her own crap is my mother.  I'd love to wish her and my father Happy Anniversary for tomorrow, they've been together for 44 years.  Crazy, isn't it? In this world of five minute marriages and starter husbands.  I give her credit for hanging on.  Hey, I give him credit too! Any of us who put up with anyone else and them with us (?) for 44 years deserves blissful happiness.  May they be blessed with many more fantastic years.  They are the best parents a gal could ask for.

So do you? Hang on to your crap?
I know I do.  I have a closet stuffed full of clothes I no longer wear.  So this past three weeks have been an experiment in minimalising-including limiting my online time.  I have made a promise to myself to wear everything I own over the next little while at least one more time before I decide it's fate. If I like it or can repurpose it, it can stay.  If it doesn't suit me or I've grown tired of it, bye bye!

I wanted to mix up my meal planning as well.  Growing tired of the moans and groans (I could live on salad and steak, apparently not everyone can? Shock me!) I let the kids take over meal planning.  They have to write out the dinner menu for the week and stick it on the fridge and I make it.  Easy.  No more groans.  They've made some excellent choices too...very proud of their self-restraint.  No hot dogs on that list.  Gotta love the fact that they stepped up to the task in a serious manner.  I rule the fridge with an iron fist and there has to be green and lean on the plate.  They are now in "control" and they are eating.  Good.  One less thing.

We've started being outdoors more.  I mean, a lot more.  Walking, running, hiking.  It's done us a world of good. It's amazing what fresh air and sunshine does the the psyche...it's like an oil change for the soul.  Yes, soul.  My hubby thinks I use that word "soul" too much...but soul is as soul does and soul to the soul to the freakin soul baby!!! We got soul. Uh huh.

Last, but not least.  The sleep.  Ah, sweet sleep.  Precious balm for the soul! There I go again. I don't function on no sleep so I decided since I love to sleep that I would.  No more staying up until 2am drinking red wine and reading.  It shows.  My skin looks younger.  I feel more spry.  Like a 30 year old.  LOL!

So I'll leave you now, to go read my Morocco travel guide.  Yes, no more harrassing posts from me. The trip sold and the lucky ten of us are going so I won't mention it again until I leave and then of course when I come back.  Did any of YOU sign up? If so let me know here...leave me a comment. Wish I could take all of you. 

That's all folks. For now.
Love and other soulful things-
G
xo

The party threw itself.

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return."

-{Eden Ahbez}

There have never been truer words written, thought, or said-ever. To me, this is it.  This quote says it ALL. For what else is there?

The pursuit of money is designed to bring more of it, meditation is practiced to achieve states of it, any and all addictions dry up the well and come morning the love spring seems depleted yet again.  Then goes the cycle of the pursuit of love once more. But it needn't be pursued.  It's forever here.

If you think about it, every single action in your life is designed with this one thing in mind, to draw in love. Even the power hungry, at their very core just need love.  The angry.  The crazy.  The sane.  It's the common denominator.  Eden knew this, and his camping under the Hollywood sign despite having the money to afford real accomodation was his realization of it.  He got it.  There is more to love than meets the eye.  It comes not to us in the material.  That is to me, both a blessing and a relief.

Speaking of blessings the party threw itself (the youngest's seventh birthday sleepover party).  There were spa treatments, Coke floats, pizza, pinatas, arts & crafts, a dance competition, movies and finally, slumber.  Yup, the seven year olds got their swerve on last night and it was a high old time!  They all went home at noon today aglow with trophies, loot and lasting memories of the festivities.  {And hopped up on major sugar. You're welcome. No granola at my parties.}  Might I add that there wasn't a single argument, and that they had some of the best manners on young people I have ever witnessed. 

So today my house is surprisingly and remarkably clean and I'm just a fool-in-love for this shamrock which I think is masquerading as a wood sorrel? Does anyone know what this is? I've always called them shamrocks because they arrive just in time for green beer season. Enjoy this Monday.  Drink some green juice, go for a fresh walk in crisp spring air, read a book.  Me I'll bbq a steak for dinner, wash it down with a Barking Squirrel and read my book....ahhh paradise.  LOVE.

xo

Love in exotic far off lands? Perhaps you should travel with me to Morocco this October. You may find a carpet to fall in love with, a starlit sky, a camel or some delicately woven blankets...maybe the starlit sky is all you need though?  I'm going this October and you should come too.

Click here for Magical Morocco.

Thoughts on things to love about evenings.

"There are moments, above all on June evenings, when the lakes that hold our moons are sucked into the earth, and nothing is left but wine and the touch of a hand."

{-Charles Morgan}

evening view at the spa: winding down for the day

Evenings are the best times of day for me.  Do you have a particular time of day you love most?

{I adore mornings, so much though.  Don't tell evening, I don't want her getting jealous. Perhaps mornings are even my favourite. Again, shhh. This harkens back to a time when I'd rise at 5:30 am, slide my sleepy body into running gear and hit the road to wake up greeting the orange sun through silver trees. The meditative pounding of shoes on pavement, happy birdsong, the cold, fresh rush of air into tired lungs....to be at one with the Universe while she wakes is the most incredible feeling that can't be described here, least of all by me.}

But lately, I've got this true appreciation for evenings and I just can't shake it. The smoldering light.  The quiet.  Pouring a glass of red wine and sitting down to a meal with the family. It's sheer poetry in motion. It's the poetry of simply living.

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

 i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

-e.e. cummings

poetry in the evening: dream board creation

I love the light for photography at dusk.  The evenings provide just the right amount of gold if you can wait patiently for that few minutes of precious shooting time.

I love a book {the poetry of e.e.cummings, John O'Donohue or Mary Oliver...}in the evening after a good meal; one that draws me in for hours until my eyes are heavy and I've no choice but to sleep.

I love evenings when my lovely friend drops in with wine and glue sticks.  Yes...a winning combination.  She's full of passion for the same things as I: therefore we cut & paste & paint & inscribe our hearts on to paper all the while sharing retirement plans. Ideas, rather. I've no actual plans.  Just a hell of a lot of great ideas. {Panama?}

Evenings want you to sit down, relax your tense shoulders, sink in to that sofa. The evening beckons you with her waning daylight and her promise of flickering candles.  Taking one hand the evening pats the chair beside her and says, 'Sit. You know you wanna.'

I love perusing cook books in the evenings. I found a loaded baked potato salad that was simply heaven! Making it again tonight.  {My baby turned seven today. Seven years of folly, fun and sweet unconditional love. We will gather for cake & tea. Where do the years go? Who's got them?}

Sometimes evenings get crazy ideas, like 'Let's clean the closet out right now!'. It is then that you must gently and kindly tell the evening, 'No, I'll meet you halfway and do some photo editing.  While I sit, with my wine.' You must be firm on this, because she'll sometimes try to trick you into thinking that her chunk of time is the right time to play catch up. Remember that she's really on your side, sometimes she just gets a little carried away.  You can show her a picture of a hammock at sunset to set her straight again.

I love spending evenings catching up with my online classes and humbly taking pen in hand to write. I swear one day I'll share something with  you.  I just need the nerve.  And to get over the fear of rejection.  Because really, what does it matter? The act of writing itself is the thing.  Whether people like it or not shouldn't matter a tick.

Evenings have no expectations.  No deadlines. They just are.  Which is why I love the potential they show each day. They are there to be written with love and carved out with bliss.  With no pressure.  Just lingering, patiently waiting for you to make up your mind about which way it's going to go. 

Gillian

xo

p.s. Calling all iPhoneography lovers...check out the @igerstoronto feed on Instagram if you want to take part in tomorrow's meet-up in Toronto.  Also follow IgersToronto on Facebook for more information about start times and meeting locations.  Tomorrow is supposed to be 12 degrees, the perfect temperature for a walk about with your iPhone and fellow IGers.





Crave some cosmic purpose.

"And from beyond the intellect,

beautiful Love comes dragging her skirts,

a cup of wine in her hand..."

{Rumi}

I beg of you patience; for today's post is outrageously unfocused.

The gorgeous doorway crashing soul Lisa Field-Elliot made some really artfully photographed notecards, I bought them immediately as I'm constantly penning thankYOUs and iLOVEyous and the like...so I buy cards before needing them...alas THESE were simply stunning and spoke to my very soul. The quote at the start of this post {that I found on one of Lisa's notelets} struck me in the face like a slap on the chops that one of those old black and white movies are famous for!   And so I wanted to remember the Rumi quote because it literally sung to me as though the words were written about me. 

Of course they weren't written about me, they were written about Love herself  but hey; if I love, give love, and be love....expect love even....then it was written for me so THANK YOU, Rumi. If I could send you one of Lisa's cards I would.  {Because as we know...Rumi wrote that for Lisa too.}

The enchantress Soul Aperture herself Christina Martin honoured me with a nod. Thank you Christina, you kindred spirit you.

Annnd Monday night will not get here soon enough.  Dinner and dream boarding with one of my best friends.  We simply do not see enough of each other and we both hope to change that.  What is finer than an evening of art with one of your best girlfriends? Nuthin.

I'm burning a Fireside scented candle {which is supposed to smell like a wood fire but it smells like sandalwood & pine got busy and made a baby!) and I'm kind of wishing now that I had bought several of them.  I'm a winter girl.  {Adoring the heavy, woody scents.} Yes, I've  been known to buy in to the summer berries but they aren't complex enough.  I need a scent with substance and heart.  Berries are too aloof {yes aloof!}, though they pretend to be just the opposite. Berries are the juvenile delinquents of the scent world. Sorry, but it's true! You just can't get to know a berry.

 An earthy wood like Sandalwood is well...it is the Socrates... or the Oscar Wilde. Complex, wordy, worldly.

The mug in the photo above isn't mine, though I drink out of it everyday as though it were. {Possession is nine tenths of something or other.}  Truth be told, I've NO IDEA where it came from but it landed in the spa and it's blue and green and beige pottery hued goodness feeds me a steady stream of coffee from 9 until the day ends so it's my favourite mug in the Universe.

I'll leave you now to crave your own cosmic purpose, as we all should.  {If you watched the Carl Sagan video I linked above that will make sense. Take the time to watch it, you'll be delighted.} I'm off to bed; tomorrow comes early, albeit a Sunday.  That matters not when children are involved.  They know no clocks, you see.
To them, it's all a bloody miracle. And they are MY cosmic purpose.
xoxo
Gillian

The Unexpected Gift: A Story of The Sisterhood of the Travelling Red Tutu

Dear Readers, 

I have a story to tell you. About a gift that arrived for me at work, one cold and snowy afternoon last December.  Bubble wrapped to perfection, with beautiful handwriting on the label. The gift was a Travelling Red Tutu, sent to me to brighten my day.

The Tutu that I had received was not an ordinary gift.  It wasn't like a book or a dress or the like...it was the gift of an experience.

The Red Tutu has been places.  It travels, does the salsa with unexpecting souls.  When gifted with it, the recipient is to put the tutu on, and take photos of herself dancing in it. Then in turn blog about the experience.

When Sherry Smyth sent me the package containing the Travelling Red Tutu I opened it at once and the gorgeous thing just about swooped out of the bag as though it would take flight! It was loaded with happy, swirly dancing energy. It cheered me up immediately just to look at it.

Sherry Smyth told me that she chose me because she thought I had a "joie de vivre" that would do the Travelling Red Tutu proud. For thinking that kindly of me, I thank her!

But sadly, I wasn't in a position at the time to do anything with the tutu.

On my birthday, which was on January 6th, I was in a place of mild despair.  The holidays had been so maddening, with work and life in general and everything just seeming so daunting, I couldn't bring myself to dance in the Tutu. It would have felt dishonest, insincere. 

I wanted to honour this Travelling Red Tutu with integrity.  Wanted to wear it when my heart was soaring, uplifted, and full.  I didn't want to put it on and perhaps transfer some of the negativity that I was feeling into the Tutu.  I believe that clothing and jewelery takes on the energy of the wearer.  I didn't want to ruin this wondrous travelling Tutu!

So I gazed at this lovely vision. Mystified, enchanted.

I read the accompanying heartfelt and sweet letter that Sherry wrote.

Soon after opening the parcel,  I wrapped it around my favourite chair, in my favourite room, with the company of all my belove stuff...Mexican blankets, wooden Cuban sculptures, and coffee table books on New York Photography and Frida Kahlo's art.  I waited for the right morning.

Mornings came, mornings went.

I was feeling far too down to get this task done.

It spent the better part of two months there.

Then in recent days I noticed her again.

I spoke to her, this sweet Travelling Red Tutu.

"I love your fancy shmancy frills," I wooed.

                      

"Well Gillian," she spoke in a velvet tone of understanding and calm, "when you feel up to it, we'll do our photo shoot.  I can wait.  I've been dancing for months.  It's nice to sit here with your beloved little collection of things, and children laughing and the aroma of your home-cooking.  Take your time.  But don't wait too long...I've got places to go and people to dance with."

So today was OUR day.

We swirled, to this.  {She loved this song!!!}

We twirled. 

 {We had a hard time photographing that for we were alone. Using a phone. But, we did.}

We sat and thought about the other lucky girls who had danced before us.

We looked at the globe, dreaming of what was in store.

We read Mary Oliver and drank Winter White earl grey.

Then we felt a little sad.

For we knew our time, had come.

It was time for her to go.

We sat down together one last time.

As I packaged her up, ready to send off to the next birthday girl...I whispered protective spells and tucked a gift of talismans into her fancy, shmancy frills. {I'm paying it forward for taking such a long turn with her.} Travelling Red Tutu comes complete with charms for the next girl to keep now.

"Go swiftly and safely, little Red Tutu," I begged. "I am so sorry it took me so long to dance with you, please forgive me."

"Keep dancing, Gillian."  

And I swear she smiled.

Thank you Sherry, for including me in the Sisterhood of The Travelling Red Tutu.

Where will she end up?

No one knows for sure!

{Well I know.} However I'm not spoiling the fun by telling you.

Please stay tuned to find out where she lands next. Please click through the link to Sherry's blog Portobella Lane to read her account of The Sisterhood of the Travelling Red Tutu, and find out it's origins, and where it's heading.

Where the idea began.

Where it went next.

It's been here.

There too.

It landed squarely here.

To moi.

and who to next...hmmmm?

***

p.s. I have to tell you that I'm over the moon about taking Graciel's The Soul In Bloom course. Wow is it amazing!! I'll share more on that in a later post.

I'm also over the moon again for the 6 Reasons You're Not Writing (and six ways to start) e-course my friend Chris Kay Fraser is running.  Swoon. There's no excuse now.

I just may be writing more after all.

***

Love, Gillian xo

my inner Mexico time

My inner clock reset when in Mexico.  I was excited to be up with the sun; fully refreshed, ready to awaken and dress & go eat a produce-laden breakfast with the family.  Bedtime was midnight-ish, sometimes earlier. This rejuvenating trip helped me to realize how much I don't pay much attention to the sleeping/waking needs of my body on an ordinary basis.  I like my inner Mexico time.  It works far better for me physically than this Canadian, slave-to-the-grind time. 

 

I miss the beauty of Mexico & her blue skies & her fresh bananas.  I long for the grilled pineapple, the iguanas, the cool limestone paths through the jungle.  Surf, sanddollars, and snuggling with stingrays. I love that the 500 note has Frida Kahlo on it.  I love that they have beautiful money.  I am in love with all things spicy & homemade & handcarved; woven blankets and clay cups and silver.  

As my days & nights blur once more, I close my eyes and wrap my arms around Mexico; clinging to the memory of it and praying it will see me through my grey days, my long work hours, my taxes. 

I wander into the kitchen for a square of dark Mexican chocolate and a strong sweet cup of tea, to ponder just that.

xo Gillian

p.s. Graciel has put together an online course called The Soul in Bloom.  It begins on February 25.  This Saturday! There is also a one day retreat being hosted in Buffalo, NY in March.  Click through to find out all the delicious details of this wonderful, multi-faceted course.  There is a nugget of something here for all of us. 

scents & sounds & pure JOY

I am now thinking of ways to make writing a part of my everyday, thanks to two brilliant coaches.
Remembering, dreaming, and manifesting. Poetry. Art. Messy stuff. Sparkles. GLUE. Tonight was magic.

Danette & Chris, thank you.

With JOY,
Gillian xo

A portrait of moi. Thank you, Ileana. Miami or bust!!!

Ileana the talented illustrator did my portrait.
Love the lashes, Ily. You were very generous. xo

um, i don't think she sees the little bones?

*Update on Sylvia:*
my little sweetie has clean teeth once again! and her ears are now free of whatever was bothering her.  she can hear again too~!

once again please meet little Sylvia...our 13 year old Jack Russell who is a "Cig-uard Dog" at the tobacco shoppe (along with her cousin Lucky who is head of security...Luck is about seven pounds and she's a Yorkie with cute hair accessories.)

well, i took out Sylv's trusty toothbrush and chicken-flavoured toothpaste this morning to brush her teeth and i just gasped. she needs some serious scaling! so i called the vet and booked her in for a teeth cleaning appointment.  she is not fond (and never was) of chewing the hard bones to keep her teeth clean.  she prefers the easy stuff, the chewy little lamb flavoured gingerbread men with smiles.  the size of your thumbnail.  really cute.

the joys of dog ownership are innumerable. those of you who share your life with a canine know what i'm talking about. their loyal nature.  their forever brown eyes.  their lashes. their sighs while sleeping.  their twitchy legs and grunts while dreaming {you just know they are bolting somewhere in a field going for that hare....}

so when i saw her teeth this morning i saw too her age.  i had a pang in my stomach. sort of a flash of melancholy and deep love. this little sweetie is such an intertwined part of our existence....well.

i'll leave it at that.

so for now, i brush her coat.  then vaccuum up the hair.  take her to the spa.  get her teeth cleaned.  let her sleep on my best Indian handprint pillows and tuck her in with one of Olivia's old baby blankets every night.
xo
gillian

two more things:

the free people blog is beautiful and chock full of prettiness from dresses styled as horses, to kale chip recipes (one of my favourite snacks...you wouldn't believe the crunch of kale chips-so crispy!)

i made the BEST homemade microwave (yes, microwave) black pepper & rosemary potato chips...because i just can't get enough crunch or salt it would seem. you make them on parchment paper in the micro and they are fast, only six minutes per batch.  i should share the recipe with you next time if you are interested.  imagine, you are at home suffering from a potato chip craving the likes of which the world has never seen before...you go into your kitchen, get your olive oil, one potato & two spices.

six minutes later you are back in your studio or on your couch or lying in bed watching your fave movie.
(just don't get crumbs in the bed!)

i married my math teacher and it was no problem. {get it? lol! i crack me up}

from the corner of an elephant grey room i spy my favourite blue curtains (which aren't actually mine but they are in my spa in the hair salon and they are the brainchild of one of my favourite people Natalie!).  i don't think of blue as cold at all...in fact the opposite...of healing and refreshment and life! just wanted to share something small that makes me happy. 

yet another....

...i'm in love with the winter right now as strange as that sounds because i love hats and layering and funky gloves and i like the snow falling outside my window while i'm cosied indoors with a hot chocolate and this book which is as intriguing as it is entertaining me...it would be a super fun screenplay.

one of life's joys....

...a suprise visit from a very kind, and very funny man I haven't seen in fifteen years or so...my once-upon-a-time math teacher who is so spirited and as I said already...funny...popped in to my husband's tobacco shoppe to pay us a visit.  his son is an author of a very popular blog and has sold several books of sheer awesomeness to go along with it...read this blog post Neil wrote about his father.  as i read it I kept nodding my head in agreeance because Neil's father is exactly that. and then some.

surprise visits are the greatest things...and to see a familiar face after many years is a form of pure joy.

the next time you get a feeling come over you something like...'i should drop in on so-and-so...' or 'should i call ____?' then do it!

just do it and make their day.  i'm thrilled that Mr.Pasricha popped by to say hello to us...he taught alongside my husband for many years. though he is retired now he seems as active and curious about the world as ever.

he's an example to us all...!

{now go make someone's day}

xo

Gillian

p.s. for those of you who are keen observers...yes, i married my math teacher.  {not Mr.Pasricha! ;) }

something new under the sun

in as much as i can gauge the state of the economy based on the ebb & flow of my small business...i can also turn that spotlight on myself when it comes to the current state of my mind. i don't need to read the financial pages to know that things are tough out there.
by the same token, you need to only look around my home to tell how things are internally for me.  chaos.  pure unadulterated chaos. large to-do lists undone, piles of undone laundry (i despise ironing, as you can see from my wrinkled table cloth) and the most accurate indicator of internal neglect is the state of my houseplants.  my beloveds. they seem to wilt, dry up, drop leaves, turn black or orange, and just in general...suffer.

my favourite thing to do is tune in to this and go into rescue action.  i cater to their needs first: warm water with food, deadheading, turning the pots, maybe relocate some that aren't faring too well...then i slow down and take a look around and realize that the priorities need to change in many arenas.

these fresh pink tulips were from a friend, for my birthday, hand delivered to my place of business with a hefty side dish of well wishes and a parting hug.

you know, it's the little gestures that really make me WAKE UP.

on that note, I wanted to order the new TOAST catalogue and was saddened to discover they no longer ship to Canada.  woe is me! if you are ever in need of pretty inspiration for your home or personal style, this place has it in spades.

homemade wild mushroom soup tonight...a good book...readying my satchel for work tomorrow.  my lists are back in action and begging for things to be scratched off.

here is a great link for soup {avocados, hello!!}
here is a great link for a workshop these lovelies are hosting at my wee shoppe {see also 'self love manifesto', sidebar}
leaving you with prayers for saddened hearts, hope for better days, inspiration for action, and love. lots of love in droves.

ever notice the balance in nature...? she always knows how to care for her plants.
xo

handwashing scarves & watering green things

it's a crunchy, wintry day out there.

i am hand washing scarves in hot soapy water then laying them flat to dry. they smell so good.

all things green and gorgeous like this tiny Christmas fern had a good warm drink with fertilizer this morning.

i just wanted to see how you are all doing, as you know i'm a scarcity these days...

walking dog

snuggling children

working

celebrating

Tony Bennett-ing

deciding which fairy lights to keep up all year and which to bin away

jetting about town in new shearling lined boots that go with all kinds of skirts and pants

making resolutions

planning a Christmas party (yup, you heard me! Christmas in January)

adoring my eldest in her new eyeglasses

iPad apping

painting

dreaming

layering jewellery to indicate that i'm entering a room (loud and tinkly)

loving my negative ion bracelet that helps me sleep so well it isn't funny

going shopping now for birthday presents,  new slippers (i think red) and fiesta ware bowls for cereal

going to stop along the roadside somewhere to shoot a wintry photo

then

a matcha green latte smoothie with lychee and strawberries

up to now I found my muse had taken me by the hand and we were off musing together so much so that i had little to report because my days were stuffed full with stuff!

now it is my hope to shine online once more with regular updates because that THAT is part of what brings me joy.

(other than playing scrabble at night while wrapped in warm blankets.)

xo

My life is my shrine.

Today I am celebrating Dia de los Muertos the best way I can, with marigolds grown from seeds, planted back at the start of the summer when the sun was Mexican hot. I hold loved ones dear in my heart, where they will live forever until one day I'm walking that familiar sand beach with them once more. 

I am not sick with grief; life is for the living.  I know this.  I also know that where they are now, they would embrace this with their entire being, this sentiment of mine.  This sentiment of my life as my shrine.  I honour who I am and those who've gone before me by being fully immersed in the everyday goodness that lies all around me. I drink it in, so thankful and laden with gratitude for;

My renewed sleep as of late, for my bountiful harvest of two gorgeous outdoor planters bursting with marigolds, for feeling refreshed. 

For a hearty Mexican feast tonight complete with hot chocolate & spicy tacos.  A pen and journal to keep up with my own barometer of thought; how ever the ever changing and wild currents flow abundantly into the shrine {that is me} and back outward again.  Turquoise and sea green beads that need threading.  I'm too enthralled with their colour to know quite what to do with them. 

Self portraits are showing age and yet wow I don't care! I'm so happy to be me because as of late the Universe has shown me with flying colour who I do not want to be. Yes, a gift. {Gifts strangely disguised, love it.} For these things I am grateful and so much more.  Oh!! Dia de los Muertos also gifted me a dream.

And by the way, it was the second time I've had it, and it was of a Golden Goose. I was a Queen...I bent down to pick him up and he was honking like mad, really quite funny and sweet.  He followed me around and wouldn't stop honking with rather a smile on his beak if I'm not mistaken! So I stroked his feathers and he nuzzled my neck and I've never seen such a true gold in nature like that not even in a dream.  I looked into his sacred and divine eyes and I said I can't keep you, I must let you go. He honked a wee protest at first but then I threw open my enormous front door (this dream was pure magic! I lived in my real house only it was a castle in the dream, with all of my loved things inside but only larger than life...) and I released him into the air of night with a rush of golden wings and a sublime honking song only the true friend of a goose would understand.  Ahhh.  He was better off in the wild open skies to live his gorgeous golden life.

The dream theme is kind of akin to the thoughts of our loved ones when they pass.  Though we treasure them more than mere earthly gold and don't want them to ever leave us...we know, in our heart of hearts...in our soul of souls...that they belong to the wide open skies. So to end this day, I'll paint, I'll light candles to honour my passed loves, I'll soak in a tub.  Enjoy all the things about this wonderful beautiful life that I can while I'm still here. 

A joyous song for the living and the golden geese {dance, g'head.} (Well the beat is uplifting anyhoo. Makes me wanna boogie.)

xoxo Gillian

The air here is peace. Is light.

There is contentment in the Universe finally.

Breathing room.

I love this feeling of peace that has settled over our house, our hearts.

Out with the old.

In with the fresh.

Feels good.

Hot chocolate time, see you again real soon.

Missing blue jeans & living the life that is waiting for me; A lesson in blessing counting.

Hello! It's a sweet sunny Tuesday and well I just can't find my favourite new jeans. And I'm so bummed about it!!
I've searched, I've hunted and pleaded with the jean's Gods...to no avail.  Do you have a pair of jeans that are your go to pair? I do! And this makes me sad that they are no where to be found.

It disappoints me like I were a twelve year old again, and I just can't explain that! I allow some of the smallest most trivial things tip my scale.  I could handle major and I mean MAJOR crises with ease and grace but small things really jangle my wagon.  I guess I need to just breathe. 

Yesterday being a holiday Monday, we wanted to really embrace the day so we did only things that brought us joy! We read, with hot cups of tea.  My daughter taught me to "ripstik", and man you should see me go! It's like snowboarding on the road, and its so much fun she had to beg me to give her the stik back! I suggest if you want to keep a spring in your step and a lightness in your being you give ripstikking a try.  You won't regret it.  I was laughing so hard and really surprised myself with my skills. ;) {Although nothing like the video, yet. Insert nerdy giggle snort here----> tee hee!}

We washed the car and cut the grass underneath a warm and blazing October sun...thinking that just maybe we had been transported to the Bahamas, the weather was that beautiful! 

I had put a sweet onion basted turkey in the oven and surrounded it with halved apples and it smelled simply wonderful.  Since we had our holiday meal at my sister-in-laws place the day before, this was a small turkey so that we'd have our own "leftovers".  For that alone, I suppose I'll count my blessings right? Yes, absolutely.  Having hot delicious and nutritious food is something I will try to never take for granted. 

And joy of joys two friends from the trip to Jordan are joining me once more in Morocco! I am so happy I could sing! In fact I did sing, when I read their messages.  These two girls are among some of the best people I've met in my life and I am thrilled to be spending nine spicy days and eight starry nights in Morocco with them.  I just know you would love these ladies too, and the greatest thing about a trip like this is the connections you make with new people you meet in your travel group.  It bonds you like nothing else, a journey to a new country to see inspiring new things with like minded people.  If you want to go to, why don't you? Just click the link and follow the directions. Easy peasy lemon squeezy!

I think people need exotic trips.  It keeps things interesting and inspiring along our river of life.  On that note, I'll leave you with my favourite quote of the week...from Joseph Campbell, "We must forget the life we planned in order to live the life that's waiting for us."

The ripstik is waiting.  I must go learn to turn.  Seriously!!! xo

p.s. Have you tried these chips? I wish I never met them. ;)